Do the right thing.
Doing the “right” thing is not easy. Even more challenging is knowing what the right thing to do is. I’m not referring to ethical or moral decisions, although those can be equally challenging. I’m referring to actions that move us in a particular direction. Choices that impact future choices carry their own unique consequences. It may involve making decisions that go against our own desires or beliefs or be difficult to make in the face of peer pressure. When making positive changes, we often encounter obstacles from those we love the most. Also, choosing the wrong path can be devastating and have long-term implications, making the initial decision much more vital. It is important to dissect our choices and consider the implications of our decisions before acting, which includes time and resources. Confidence in knowing you’re doing what you should support the convictions you’ll need when challenges arise.
Defining the “right” thing.
The first step is understanding your core values, beliefs, and inherent character strengths. Several popular assessments can help you uncover your own distinct personality, values, strengths, and weaknesses. I’ve included a list at the bottom of this post. Using one or more of these as a foundation helps fill in the gaps on what we’re doing and where we should leverage our efforts. There’s nothing wrong with having a hobby or desire that you’re not initially adept at. The challenge alone may provide the motivation to keep improving. But there is a philosophy that encourages us to lean into our strengths and build goals around them. That’s why understanding ourselves and possessing a basic level of self-awareness helps us define what to do and where to focus our energies.
Every situation is different, and what may be the right thing to do in one circumstance may not be right in another. We must consider the values and ethical principles that are important to us and the potential consequences of our decision. We must also recognize that the right decision may differ for different people. Looking at the failures or successes of others can be a helpful guide, but it doesn’t mean your outcomes will be the same.
How to choose.
Once we have identified what we consider the right thing to do, we must evaluate our options. We should consider the resources needed to fulfill the goal. These include things like money, time, and effort. For most people, providing unlimited amounts of those three resources would lead to success in almost anything. It’s important to look at goal setting through this lens because it clarifies the importance and appropriately weighs the desire to proceed. Knowing how much time will be required to succeed while guiding us on scheduling our time. Do we need to, or are we willing to sacrifice time with our family and friends? Depending on the goal, maybe…or maybe not. Do we have the money required, or do we need to find another way to fund our adventure? If we start now and maintain discipline throughout, how long will it take to achieve? Know ahead of time that your estimate will likely be way off. We should also consider our own values and ethics and evaluate the pros and cons as they apply to these decisions.
Confronting the obstacles.
We may experience doubt and fear along the way. Preparing for this eventuality is crucial, and it’s important to acknowledge that these feelings help solidify that we’ve made the right choice. Fear of failure is greatest when we’re pursuing something we want. If we didn’t care about our investment of time and energy, then failing wouldn’t matter or be a concern. We must also be prepared to handle the difficult consequences of our decision. Feelings of guilt or shame for not following our own desires or for going against the opinions of our peers. Friends and family may feel rejected or replaced when we start dedicating our time differently. We must recognize these feelings and are doing something worthwhile for ourselves and others. We must also remember that we are not alone; others are making similar decisions and facing similar consequences in pursuing their own goals.
Staying the course.
Doing the right thing involves honesty and transparency. We should not be afraid to admit when we’ve made a mistake or have chosen the wrong path. We have to accept responsibility and take complete ownership of our decisions. We must also be willing to learn from our mistakes and to communicate openly with others about our decision and their consequences. One of the greatest benefits of striving for something is learning from our decisions, both good and bad.
Finally, we should strive to be consistent in our actions. Doing the right thing once does not guarantee we will do it again. Continually evaluating our choices and considering our values and ethics is key to personal growth and development. This often requires us to make difficult decisions and face difficult consequences. However, it is important to remember how our actions impact others and that we must strive to do the right thing in all circumstances. Doing so takes courage and perseverance, but it will ultimately lead to a more meaningful life and a better world.